


Shallura Drabbles: The Angsty, Painful Version

by smolsarcasticraspberry



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Angst, Death, Drabbles, F/M, Heartbreak, shallura - Freeform, some violence
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-27
Updated: 2017-02-27
Packaged: 2018-09-27 08:45:33
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 7
Words: 3,367
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9988910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smolsarcasticraspberry/pseuds/smolsarcasticraspberry
Summary: A collection of short shallura drabbles and one-shots, mostly based off tumblr prompts or requests. These are all the ones that came out super-dark and angsty - break-up ficlets, characters getting injured, that sort of thing. If you feel like crying a lot - this is the collection for you!





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> These drabbles were all originally posted on tumblr. Most of them aren't part of the same storyline, although a couple sit together. Each chapter can be read as a standalone.
> 
> Catch me on tumblr (@smolsarcasticraspberry) if you like random ficlets and wild theories.

I wrote a bunch of drabbles and short ficlets based on tumblr prompts - these are all the ones that came out seriously angsty and dark. I probably won't continue any of these into full-length fics, so if you see an opening you like and want to keep writing it, knock yourself out.

**A note on content:**

  * Several of these fics deal with major character death
  * Some of them depict injuries or violence. None of it is too graphic or gruesome, but it's there
  * At least one fic has an implied character suicide. IF YOU EXPERIENCE SUICIDAL THOUGHTS PLEASE BE CAREFUL READING THIS FIC. I will clearly mark it in the chapter notes. IF YOU THINK IT WILL BE A PROBLEM FOR YOU, JUST SKIP THAT CHAPTER.
  * If it seems like these get progressively darker, that's because people kept asking for more and more angst



I also have a collection of fun, fluffy drabbles if you want to read that instead of this enormous pile of pain and heartbreak. If not then I hope you like getting your heart ripped out!


	2. Rescue

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sort of an alternative ending to season 1, where Shiro rescues Allura from the Galra prison cell.

**Based on the prompts: “Go to hell.” and “You make me feel invincible.”**

After a while, the footsteps of the guards became a steady rhythm outside her cell; a drumbeat that marked the hours when nothing else did. Until the rhythm was broken by a sound she recognised.

The door slid open. She looked up.

“Shiro?”

Her voice was weak with relief. She remembered every etiquette lesson she’d ever received - how a princess should not cry in front of others. It didn’t matter. Not in front of Shiro. The tears pricked her eyes and blurred her vision, and it was his voice that pulled her back to herself.

“Princess?”

She marvelled at how he could turn a formal title into something so tender.

“Are you alright? We have to get you out of here.”

“Why did you come for me?” she whispered. “You shouldn’t have come here. What if they captured you again? Or the Black Lion…”

“It doesn’t matter, Princess. I’d go to hell for you. And back again.”

“Why?”

“I will always come for you. You make me feel invincible.”

She smiled, in spite of everything.

“You make me feel invincible too.”

“Then let’s get out of here. Together.”

He held out his hand, and she took it without hesitation.


	3. You rip my heart right out

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This ficlet had a follow-up (posted in chapter 4) because someone asked for a continuation.

**Based on the prompt: “You can lie to yourself but don’t lie to me.”**

It’s easier if she tells herself that it’s as meaningless to him as it is to her. That it’s just about physical release for both of them. Then she doesn’t have to feel guilty about the late night visits, or all the times she’s pulled him into an abandoned side-corridor because she just needs to _feel something._

She can believe it, too, if she just ignores all the warning signs. The way he loses his breath every time he kisses her; the softness in his eyes when he lies beneath her; the way his hands grip her hips as if he’s trying to prevent her escaping his grasp. Sometimes he’ll lie next to her in the bed and trail his fingers down the bare skin of her back, and she has to bury her face in the pillows because if she sees his face in that moment, _she’ll know_ , and she won’t be able to feign ignorance any longer.

It comes to a head when she decides to put an end to their arrangement.

“Pidge has almost caught us several times,” she says, her voice matter-of-fact. “And I’m sure Coran is beginning to suspect something. I think it’s best if we put things on hold for now.”

“Right,” he says. His face is unreadable, and he looks nothing like the sweet soul she knows him to be. Still, they’re in the middle of a war. No time for silly romantic notions.

“We both knew this was just an arrangement of convenience,” she says.

“For you, maybe.”

She looks at him, and this time the pain in his face is undeniable.

“I’m sorry if you thought this was something–”

“Spare me, please,” he says. His voice is tight with repressed anger. “I don’t wanna hear it. You can lie to yourself but don’t lie to me. You know how I feel about you. You’ve known all along. You just ignored it because it was more convenient to you.”

A knife to the chest would be less painful. His words cut deep, because they’re true. He’s right. She’s always known.

“Please - Takashi -” she says, as if anything could fix what she’s done to him.

He holds up a warning finger, and his face is like stone.

“Don’t you dare call me that.”

She lies awake that night, replaying every detail: the anger and bitterness on his face, the coldness in his voice. It’s torture. And not just because she hurt him so badly. It’s torture because he was right. She _has_ been lying to herself.

It’s easier if she tells herself that it didn’t mean anything to her, and she can believe it too, as long as she ignores all the warning signs. The way her pulse would quicken every time he smiled at her. The ache in her chest on those nights he was away from her, and she lay in an empty bed wishing for the warmth of his presence. How easy and natural it felt to curl up in his arms and let him play with her hair. The way he could make her laugh, even on the worst days.

 _It didn’t mean anything_ , she tells herself. _I don’t care. I don’t._

But she doesn’t believe it. Not this time.


	4. if you loved me at all don't call

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A follow-on from the ficlet in chapter 3.

**Based on the prompt: “Could you be happy, here, with me?”**

He’s been avoiding her.

He spends most of his time on the training deck, or running laps around the Castle corridors, or holed up in his room. He’s nothing if not professional, so it doesn’t affect the way they work together - but the comfort of his presence is gone. The friendship that had blossomed between them has vanished.

The other Paladins don’t notice. Shiro doesn’t act any different around them. If circumstances were different, Allura might have admired his ability to compartmentalise; to shut down all trace of emotion in order to get the job done. As things stand… it’s just painful to watch.

Eventually she collars him before a mission. They can’t continue this ridiculous dance, and if she doesn’t say something soon she’ll burst. She catches Shiro in the Black Lion’s hangar, running pre-flight checks, and closes the door behind her to ensure their privacy.

“Shiro…” she begins. He stiffens, but doesn’t turn to look at her. He’s been dreading this too, apparently. But he doesn’t storm out of the room in a huff, and she takes it as a small victory.

“Please… let me apologise.”

“What’s there to say?” he asks bitterly, his back still turned to her. “You’ve said everything already, haven’t you?”

“No. I haven’t.”

He turns then, the reluctance clear on his face, but at least he’s making eye contact with her now.

“I’m sorry for how I treated you.” She fights to keep her voice steady; to stem the flow of tears that threaten to spill down her cheeks. Crying won’t help her now. She needs to handle this with dignity.

“You mean the way you used me like a toy and then dropped me when you got bored?”

“I didn’t mean to treat you that way.”

“But you did.” His voice is surprisingly calm - but then, she shouldn’t be surprised that he’s so good at keeping a lid on things.

“Shiro… I know I hurt you. But I want you to know… It meant something to me too.”

“I don’t believe you,” he says.

“But it’s the truth. Believe it or not. I pushed those feelings away because I am a Princess of Altea. My duty is to the mission and to Voltron. I can’t afford emotional entanglements.”

His face softens, just a little.

“I was happy,” she says, her voice small and quiet. “When we were together. For the time that it lasted.”

“I was happy too.”

She looks up and catches his eye. There’s a softness to his expression that she hasn’t seen in weeks, and for a moment she can’t breathe.

“I know you come from another planet,” she says. “I know you want to return to Earth after this is over. But could you… could you be happy, here, with me?”

She doesn’t know why she asks. It doesn’t matter, after all. Not after she’s ripped everything apart so spectacularly. But she has to know.

“I could have been,” Shiro tells her. “Now? I don’t know.”

She wipes away the tears that spill from her eyes.

“Because of how I treated you.”

“Yes. Because of that.”

She can accept that. Any chance at happiness they might have had - she was the one who ruined it. It doesn’t come as any great surprise.

“Will you… will you give me another chance?” Her voice is so small she thinks he won’t hear her. But his face softens once again, and when he looks at her this time there’s a trace of that gentleness she used to see in his eyes whenever they were alone together.

“I don’t know,” he says. “Maybe. I can’t decide that right now.”

She nods. “Fair enough.”

“Look… let’s talk after the mission,” he says. A peace offering.

“Alright.” She smiles hesitantly, and although his expression remains guarded, his mouth twitches up at the corners just a little.

She returns to the control room with a little seed of hope in her heart. She’s distracted by thoughts of Shiro as she oversees the mission, and several times Coran has to repeat his questions to get her attention. She’s replaying a particularly fond exchange when the communicator flickers into life, and Keith’s face appears on the screen.

“Princess? You there?” he says. There’s something wrong. His voice betrays it. Something is terribly, horribly wrong.

“Yes Keith. I’m here. What happened?”

“It was Haggar,” Keith says, and his voice breaks. “She was there. On the planet. Princess, she…”

“What is it?” Allura breathes.

“Shiro. She took Shiro.”


	5. For As Long As You Need Me

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE NOTE: this chapter has some semi-graphic injury description

**Based on the prompt: “I’ll be here as long as it takes.”**

“Princess… we’re coming in hot.”

Lance’s voice came over the radio, tinged with panic, and a cold chill settled in Allura’s chest.

“What happened?” she asked.

“It’s… It’s Shiro.” Lance’s voice broke.

“It’s his arm,” Keith cut in. “It’s gone, Princess.”

“Coran! Bring a stretcher,” Allura yelled. “Meet me down at the Black Lion’s hangar at once!”

She ran the whole way, feet slipping on the tiles, not caring as she bruised her arms on the walls. The other Paladins were already in the hangar by the time she got there. She skidded to a halt in the doorway just as Hunk helped Shiro down the ramp of the Black Lion.

Shiro sank to the floor, his face pale with shock.

“Move aside,” Allura barked at the other Paladins. They parted to let her through, and she knelt by Shiro’s side.

His Galra arm was indeed gone - ripped off above the elbow, leaving a trail of wires and broken metal. Blood dripped from the stump.

“What happened?” Allura breathed.

“Galra jumped us,” Keith said. “Real nasty-looking dude took on Shiro. He just…”

“He ripped the arm right off,” Hunk supplied. He sounded surprisingly calm and put-together, and not for the first time Allura wondered at the depths that lay hidden behind his placid exterior.

“Princess…?” Shiro’s eyes fluttered open.

“Yes. I’m here,” Allura murmured.

“I’m gonna need some fixing up,” he whispered. He tried to smile.

“Yes you are,” she replied, and blinked back the tears that pricked her eyes. “And I’ll be here with you for as long as it takes.”


	6. Take One for the Team and One for the Road

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE NOTE: this chapter includes an implied character suicide.

**Based on the prompt: “Don’t come near me or I swear I’ll kill you.”**

Pidge had warned him several times that his Galra arm might be a means to control him. He’d never believed it. It seemed far-fetched. Until it happened.

He was coming out of a sparring session with Lance and Hunk when he heard Haggar’s voice in his head. His arm powered up by itself, and he rounded on Lance and Hunk before they knew what was coming. He sent Lance sprawling, and stopped with his arm only inches from Hunk’s throat.

_Kill them. Kill them all._

_“_ Sh-shiro?” Hunk’s eyes were wide with terror. Shiro ground his teeth with the effort of keeping his arm steady. Slowly - fighting for every inch - he lowered the arm.

“Get away from me,” he rasped. “Haggar - you have to - get away! Take Lance!”

He didn’t wait to see if Hunk would obey. He turned and ran for it, down the corridor toward the airlocks.

_Kill them all. Take the Lion. Return to your masters._

Out. He had to get out. Hot rivers of agony ran up and down his arm. He wanted to _swing_ and _kill_ and _fight_ and _destroy everything_. OUT. He had to get out.

Alarms sounded, somewhere far off, and as Shiro rounded the corner he saw Allura running towards him, flanked by Keith and Coran. Pidge followed behind, laptop in one hand and bayard in the other.

“Shiro? What’s going on?” Allura asked.

“Stay back!” Shiro warned. “Don’t come near me or I swear I’ll kill you!”

“It’s his arm,” Pidge said. “Haggar - she must have activated it.”

Shiro slid to a halt and reached for the controls of the airlock, but before he could open the door Allura barrelled into him. She used all her considerable strength to pin him against the wall, a hand on each of his wrists.

“I have him! Coran - get the restraints!”

“Princess, please. You have to let me go! I’ll kill all of you!”

_Kill them. Destroy them. Bring us the Black Lion._

“Shiro, listen to me,” she said, her voice icy calm. “Don’t struggle. We can fix this.”

“You can’t. You have to let me go.”

“I can’t do that, Shiro.” Her voice cracked, and a flash of panic sparked in her eyes.

She was going to try and restrain him. And then he’d break out, somehow, and slaughter everyone in the Castle - all his friends, everyone he cared about - and then take the Black Lion right into Haggar’s hands. He couldn’t let it happen.

So he did the one thing he’d thought of doing a thousand times, but never had the courage. He leaned forward and kissed her.

Allura’s eyes went wide. Her face softened, and her eyes fluttered shut. And as she pressed her lips against his, her grip on his arms slackened.

It gave him the brief window of opportunity he needed. He wrenched free of her grasp, grabbed her by the wrist, and twisted her around to pin her arms behind her back. And he was pathetically grateful that the move left her with her back to him, so he didn’t have to see the betrayal and despair on her face.

“I’m so sorry, Princess,” he whispered in her ear. Then he reached out his hand to open the airlock doors. He shoved her away from him, stepped into the airlock, and slammed the doors shut.

_Kill them kill them kill them kill them kill them_

Allura turned and hammered her fists on the door.

“Shiro! Shiro open the door!”

He sliced his Galra arm through the control panel instead, sending up a shower of sparks. The airlock evacuation sequence started to count down.

{{Decompression in t-minus 30 ticks}}

They would be safe from him. The Lion would be safe. That was all that mattered.

“Hang on, I can work around this.” Pidge’s voice sounded desperate. Shiro didn’t look at her, or the others, even as Hunk and Lance came staggering up the corridor. He looked at Allura instead.

“Allura, listen to me,” he said. “When I’m gone, wormhole out of her. Get as far away as you can. If Haggar activated the arm, she’s probably tracking me.”

“No,” she whispered. “No. We’re going to get you out of here.”

“You can’t do that. It’s too risky. I’ll kill everyone in this Castle. You have to take Voltron and get out of here.”

{{Decompression in t-minus 20 ticks}}

Allura pressed her face and hands to the glass. Tears streamed down her cheeks.

“Shiro… No. Please. Open the door.”

He pressed his face to the glass, as close to her as he could get.

“You’re the Black Paladin now, Princess,” he whispered. “The Lion will trust you. Because I trust you.”

“We’re going to get you out of here.”

“Allura… I’m so sorry.” He smiled at her, even as the tears spilled from his own eyes. “I should have told you how much I love you. But you were always too good for me.”

She shook her head. “No. No never. Takashi - please.”

He didn’t even know she knew his name.

{{Decompression in 3… 2… }}

“Goodbye Princess.”

{{…1}}

The last thing he saw was her face, before he fell away into oblivion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Voltron fam please: if you ever feel like throwing yourself out of an airlock, call a friend or a doctor or a suicide hotline. Look after yourselves.


	7. Where I Can't Follow

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> PLEASE NOTE: this fic has some semi-graphic descriptions of injuries, including mention of blood.

**Based on the prompt: “Don’t you dare die on me!”**

Shiro staggered down the hallways of the Galra ship. Blood dripped from his side, and his breath sounded ragged in his own earpiece.

“Guys…” he rasped. “I think I’m gonna need an extraction.”

“Hang on Shiro.” Allura’s voice came over the radio, clipped and composed. “We’re coming to you.”

Shiro made it to an alcove and sank down against the wall.

“I don’t mean to worry you,” he said, through gritted teeth. “But could you hurry up?”

“We’re coming! Hold on!”

He must have blacked out, because the next thing he saw was Allura’s face. She tugged off his helmet, concern lacing her eyes.

“Shiro? Can you hear me?”

“You took your time, Princess,” he whispered. His side ached, and blood trickled through his fingers.

“Don’t be silly,” Allura said. “It was only a few minutes.”

She sounded calm, but the dart of her eyes over his face and body betrayed her concern.

“That bad, huh?” he said. He tried to crack a smile, and winced instead. “I don’t think I’m getting out of this one alive, Princess.”

She shot him a glare as she fumbled for the med kit at her side.

“Don’t you dare die on me, Shiro,” she scolded. “You haven’t told me what happens at the end of Star Wars.”

“Guess you’ll have to hear it from Pidge.”

“Stop talking like that. You’re going to be fine. Hold this.” She pressed a bandage to his wound, and gently moved his hand to rest over it. Shiro pressed down, holding the bandage in place.

“It looks worse than it is,” Allura said. She gave him a reassuring smile. “We’ll get you back on the ship and stick you in a cryopod. You’ll be bet–”

She stopped suddenly, and her eyes went wide.

“Wha–?” Shiro began.

His gaze fell to her chest, and the blossom of red that spread over her flightsuit like a rising tide.

Too late, he registered the sound of sentries; of blaster fire ricocheting off the metal walls. Somewhere in the distance, the other Paladins fired on the Galra sentries. Shiro ignored them. His eyes flew to Allura’s face.

“Allura?”

She sagged forward, and Shiro caught her by the shoulders, ignoring the icy daggers of pain that stabbed into his side. Blood dripped from the wound in her chest, and the colour drained from her face.

“Guys! I need help! It’s Allura!”

“Hang on, you guys! We’re coming!”

“Hang on, Allura,” Shiro whispered. But the strength faded from his arms. Allura collapsed forward onto his chest, her breathing as ragged as his.

“Sh-shiro…” Her voice came out as a whisper.

He wrapped his arms around her and buried his face in her hair. His vision blurred - through pain or unshed tears, he couldn’t tell. He could feel Allura breathing against his chest - each breath weaker than the last. She was fading fast.

“Please, sweetheart,” he whispered into her hair. “Please don’t die.”

But she went still against his chest, and he knew she was gone.


End file.
